you will find services that are
frequently needed in conjunction with divorce or separation.
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My CPA charged me $2,000 for
my return. It was a schedule C , Schedule F, Sch A,Sch B, Sch E
(rental) Form 4136, Sch D Cap Gains,(2) Form 4562's and a
Depreciation Schedule that had 15 items on it.
Our fees for this
H&R Block soaked me for $648.00. I
am self employed and there were a few paperless forms involved.
I asked them how much it would be up front. They told me it is
by the form. So when we were done, the bill was $648.00. I made
$19k last year. It took them less than an hour and I too was
very organized. After I got the bill I asked them for their ala
carte menu of forms and they would not give me one. I feel
ripped off...What can I do? I don't mind paying them, but
Our fees for this
separation or divorce creates much more than hurt feelings...
incomes becoming only one often creates
tax issues, the need for Credit Repair,
Mortgage Reduction or
OWN A HOME?, often it must be sold, or
there may be a need for a quick
refinance to pay off court allocated debts or buy out the
NOTHING IS BETTER than
the spouses being able to agree and amicably handle the myriad of
issues on their own. Unfortunately, that is usually not
how it works.
PROFESSIONAL HELP IS NEEDED... Divorce and the
related that come with it can be handled more
and inexpensively when handled under the umbrella of one company that
handles these many issues and knows
your COMPLETE SITUATION.
avoids the problems that are inevitable when the right hand does not know
what the left hand is doing.
It is our sincerest
hope that you don't need help. But if you do...
of Professionals are here for you!
Click for Related Legal Services.
Free Divorce Help, Consultations,
Information or Assistance is not always easy to find. But to minimize the
financial as well as emotional strain of the process-- to those in need, we
provide subsidized and even free Divorce help and preparation--
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Online Support Modifications, Free Consultations,
and we always strive to make your divorce as affordable as possible. It is our goal to make this sometimes
necessary life event as stress free and simple as possible. We know that even
though sometimes divorce is the best and only solution to marital problems, it's
never an easy one. So, try not to make it harder than it needs to be.
Below are 10 tips on how to
have a successful divorce.
BY SHERRY AMATENSTEIN
1. THERE ARE NO WINNERS IN DIVORCE. Stop
trying to 'best' him/or her.. Even if you get full custody of the kids and the
lion's share of the assets, you haven't won. Dr. Jane Greer, author of How
Could You Do This to Me? Learning to Trust After Betrayal (Doubleday), says,
"You've both lost! You each lost a partner, being married and dreams of happily ever after..."
Kathleen Turner and Michael Douglas may have gotten vengeful kicks 'abusing'
each other in War of the Roses, but in the end they both crashed
2. DON'T GO BACK TO RELATIONSHIP SORE SPOTS.
Ceaselessly picking at old wounds -- 'You weren't there to pick me up at the
hospital after the baby was born' Doing that will prolong your mutual agony. If you paid
attention to me after the baby was born... Keeping guilt and anger alive keeps
you connected, but only in mutual pain. Look at it this way: His flaws aren't
your headache anymore.
Important point from Bruce Castro ASN owner:
Realize, what happened in the past, is the past.
It is impossible to effectively more forward if you are constantly looking
behind you. I know it's tough, but you have to let it go.
3. DON'T USE THE KIDS AS PAWNS
OR A WEAPON. A biggie. Divorce is
tough enough on the kids without inflicting dysfunctional divorcing parental
head trips upon them. Dr. Greer advises, "Do what's best for the children in
terms of custody, visitation, and emotional health issues." Meaning, don't keep
the kids from seeing their father or visa versa. . And don't ask them incessant
questions about daddy's or mommy's new girlfriend, or which parent they love
Important point from Bruce Castro ASN
Do you want what's best for your
children?... PROTECT THEM FROM YOUR ISSUES! I've seen children of
divorcing parents go from happy straight "A" students, to morose "D"
students. Even the best case divorce dramatically impacts your
children... Bringing them into your issues makes it a hundred times
4. DON'T ALIENATE YOUR EX'S FAMILY. When you married
the son/daughter, you became their daughter/son. And through the children, you
still have ties which will be much harder to maintain if you constantly belittle
and complain about your ex to the people who raised him. That's what friends are
5. DON'T PROLONG THE SETTLEMENT PROCESS. In a just
world, you'd get what's coming to you. And so would your ex.. But life (and
settlements) aren't always fair. Obviously, don't let the ex stick it to you
over important financial issues. But when it comes to the heirloom lamp that was
a wedding gift from his or her aunt but you always liked more, let it go if you
must. "Evaluate how necessary something is to you," Dr. Greer says. If you or he
keep arguing, stalling, or nickel-and-diming one another, you'll never get the
prime benefit of divorce i.e. being rid of the person who most drives you crazy.
Important point from Bruce Castro ASN owner-
The more you fight over assets, the less you each
receive. Even if you win... you probably lost, with the only real
winner being the attorneys! I've seen couples mutually spend $2,000
over a $500 couch!
6. DON'T EXPECT EMOTIONAL RESOLUTION. See tip #5. Life
is messy, with numerous loose ends. The "injustices" you've experienced might
never be righted the way you need them to be. If you wait for full closure to
get on with your life, you might be waiting an awfully long time.
7. BE CIVIL AND COOPERATIVE. "Stay focused on your
goals," suggests Dr. Greer. You might have to work as hard at communicating as
you did during the marriage, but at least it doesn't have to be on the same
exhausting level. Greer adds, "Just reach some common ground on the issues you
need to address together, and try to be pleasant about it."
8. ERECT HEALTHY BOUNDARIES. You're not married
anymore. You don't have to (and shouldn't) tell each other everything. Greer
says, "Some exes can be friends, others are better off talking just about the
kids. Be wary of sharing too-personal details. Stay out of each other's sex
life." Which leads to #9:
9. DON'T BECOME EACH OTHER'S SEX LIFE. You're
both lonely, scared, vulnerable. The fear and anxiety attracts you to the
familiar. Remember Eve and the apple. Don't bite.
10. REVENGE IS OVERRATED. Dr. Greer puts it this way:
"Being mired in revenge plots keeps you stuck in the relationship. You're angry
and obsessed with the past instead of trying to build your future."
In short, if you're determined to make him miserable and to
be miserable yourself, you might as well stay married."
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