First, understand the moment you declare that you are going to do something different, something that can change your life and even the lives of others; you are going to get push back from the people you know and maybe even those you love.  There is no getting around it.  Those who dare to pursue their dreams are often considered crazy by those around them, their family, , their friends... sometimes even by the entire world. I know this from personal experience!  click here.

FAILURES AND REJECTIONS ARE INEVITABLE

In Part II we will specifically discuss rejection, but for now, understand  FAILURE, NEGATIVIY AND REJECTION ARE INEVITABLE PARTS OF THE SUCCESS JOURNEY.  Each of these has been encountered by every man, woman and even child who has ever had the audacity to proclaim they would do something  great or even just different; it gets even worse once they actually begin!  When you make the choice to step out and begin a new and different path, you will too.  

In the end, whether your new endeavor will result in success or failure will depend on how you respond to the challenges you will face.

HOW DO YOU RESPOND

How do you respond when you experience your first major setback i.e. failure? 

Do you tell yourself it's to hard?  I can't do it?

Or do you realize it's only a stepping stone in your journey and that no one fails until they quit?  Do you analyze what went wrong, fix it then try again?... Even if doing so requires additional time and effort? 

If you truly realize that everything worthwhile is hard and are willing to carry on, you have what it takes to overcome temporary setbacks or even occasional actual failures.

 Don't ever forget:

Successful people are those who are willing to do the things that unsuccessful people are UNWILLING to do!   Think about it, if achieving success was easy, everyone would do it! 

 HOW DO YOU REACT?

How will you react when you are awash in the negativity of even friends and family?  What happens when the tell you it can't be done or that "you just aren't made for this"? 

Will you believe them and quit?

Or will you consider the fact that they probably have zero experience or understanding of what you are doing, and therefore opinions that have ZERO value?...

Even more importantly, when the friends and family who know you, love you and hopefully have your best interests in mind tell you this just isn't for you, Will you believe them?  Trust me, if your dream is big enough, it will happen.  It certainly happened to me.  Click Here

Even worse... what if it's experts in the field proclaiming the problem is you...  you just aren't good enough?  Will you listen then???   Hell No!!!  When it comes to what you can or can't do, listen only to yourself.

Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team!

Oprah Winfrey, was told she wasn't right for TV.

Stephen King's first novel Carrie was rejected 30 times... He actually quit and threw it in the trash!  It was his wife who retrieved it and convinced him to resubmit it!

We'll discuss similar "failures" later but you must take away from this is...

There is only one person on earth remotely qualified to determine what you can and cannot do and that's you!  And if you believe that you can't... there's a good chance you are wrong!    (See Stephen King above) 

WHAT IF YOU REALLY CAN'T?

The fact is, it's possible that at this moment you don't have the complete skill set needed to achieve your objective... But that doesn't mean you can't acquire the skills, get help or even take on a partner. 

 If your motivation is strong enough, your belief big enough and your idea powerful enough you will find the help you need.  That is a fact!

Example: the Winklefoss twins had the idea for an expansive social network that would connect all colleges and universities.  It was a great idea, but the twins weren't tech people so they found and paid a college tech guy to build it for them.  Unfortunately, they apparently didn't have him sign a confidentiality or non compete agreement.  Consequently, the system was built, but not for the twins.  The tech guy was Mark Zuckerberg and what he built is now known as facebook. (Remember, when sharing ideas make sure you protect yourself legally). 

As an aside, the twins sued and settled for a substantial amount of cash and stock in facebook.  They used this to pursue a number of other ventures and became the world's first bitcoin billionaires.

What's most important is not what happens... it is how you respond

Those who responded BOLDLY to the failures, rejections and negativity they all experience are today's heroes and captains of industry and innovation; Thomas Edison, Michal Jordan, Oprah Winfrey, Steve Jobs, Abraham Lincoln and countless more endured failure and heartbreak but emerged from it all as legends...  On the other hand, those who experience the same adversities but wither in its face, scamper back to their corners, never be heard from again.

 When it's your time to face your challenges, remember this fact.  The biggest most famous successes in history followed paths mined with failures and setbacks of such magnitude and number that it would boggle the average mind.  Nevertheless, they prevailed; but not necessarily because they were so great... if they were, they would never have failed!  What set them apart was their absolute commitment to the objective!  No matter what, they refused to quit!

Few have experienced the number and magnitude of failures and rejections as Michael Jordan, Oprah Winfrey, Thomas Edison, Steve Jobs, Abraham Lincoln, Stephen King, etc... When you experience setbacks, negative comments, rejection, (which you will), respond like they did...   believe in yourself, your ideas, your dreams and continue forward!

The following statement is a gross simplification with many nuances, but nevertheless, it is a true statement:

BUILDERS-

Those who look for the best in people, ideas and opportunities.  They first look for and see the positive possibilities in people, ideas and opportunities.  Originally their focal target is to find the good in others and the reasons that an idea, job or business opportunity has the potential of success.  It doesn't mean they ignore potential down sides and jump head first into dangerous relationships and corrupt businesses.  It simply means they look to potential first, then look for the reasons to  not move forward with the relationship, idea or business.

FAULT FINDERS-

Nothing is easier than being a fault finder.  These people seem to be experts in finding what's wrong with everything!  Whether a new person, idea or business, they automatically go into fault finding mode.  No matter what it is, the immediately see a hundred things that are wrong, every drawback to every idea or business...  Their mindset is such that if they saw Christ walking on water they'd complain-
"He's not so great... he can't even swim!"

Don't get me wrong, it's important to be able to see the downside of things.  Everything has them and we must always take them into consideration.  However, the problem with the fault finder mentality is they are so adept at finding potential problems that they often have a knee jerk response of NO! before spending even 10 seconds analyzing the positives!

Empires are built by those with the builder mentality...  Futures are crushed by Fault Finders.

It is inevitable, when you step up to do something different, something big, you will meet the fault finders who will give you all the reasons you can do it (ostensibly, for your own good).  You will hear a barrage of negativity...

"You can't succeed in this economy?"
"You can't do that, you're too old"
"You can't do that, you're too young!"
"You aren't smart enough"

Or any of a thousand other reasons that YOU CAN'T  DO IT!

Ignore them... it's only intellectual garbage of unmotivated, unambitious, ill informed mediocrity.

THE COUNSEL OF OTHERS-  

Following are a few people you may have heard of that were told they weren't good enough...

DON'T DO IT!...

DO NOT, let your thoughts, ideas, beliefs or pursuits be dictated by the negativity of others who tell you what they think you can and can't do?  Don't let your life's choices and direction be determined by the beliefs of those who spend their lives creating excuses for their own failure and mediocrity!

Understand, I'm in no way telling you to ignore good advice. I'm not saying ignore those with a potentially valuable insight.  But I AM saying be discerning about who and what you allow to influence you.   But realize, if what you are considering, is really new; really revolutionary?  There are going to be VERY few people who can possibly have any relevant insight for you that is objective or useful. 

The best example of that is the Wright brothers.  No one had ever flown before.  So, who could possibly have given them valuable insights as to their chances of success?  Or how realistic was the possibility of flying in the first place or as to its potential benefit?  Virtually, no one!

So when you hear those who say it can't be done ask yourself "is this someone who actually has any expertise in this area?"  If your doctor says don't sell cyanide because it will kill people.  Listen to her, she probably knows what she's talking about.

However, if your gardener tells you there's no future in X internet business, you might want to consider the source.

What follows may seem harsh... but it is also reality.  When your friend says this or that won't work, you must to be able to say to yourself something akin to...   "It doesn't matter what he says or things.  I must keep and trust my own council.  He works at Denny's, I love him, I respect him, but this isn't his area of expertise.  He just doesn't know what he is talking about".

WHAT DOES HE KNOW?

Ask yourself, has he examined the business?  The business program?  The market potential? The investment required?  Rate of return?  Exactly how much time has he spent trying to truly understand the specifics of what you are considering?  If the answer is no or none to the above, then regardless of their general intellectual prowess the decision is clear...

 If they've haven't taken the time to understand what you are doing, They aren't qualified to offer a truly meaningful opinion.  Never give anyone's opinion more weight than it actually deserves...

Remember, Oprah was told by the supposed experts in her field that she wasn't right for TV! 

When experts can be so patenly wrong, how much less credence should we give the opinions of those whose back ground or training just doesn't warrant it?  Should you really allow your future to be impacted by them?  If not, be polite, but ignore the advice and do what you know needs to be done!

Remember, it doesn't mean you don't love them, respect them or that they are not brilliant or the most trustworthy person you have ever met.  It just means you may be in an area which they simply are not qualified and thus incapable of giving a dependable opinion on this issue. 

For example, Einstein was a great intellect, humanitarian and man of immense integrity.  However, he would probably not be the best choice for how to start and operate a hair salon!

What if portions of their background do relate to aspects of your objectives?  That's different.  That may warrant considering their opinions but generally only to those specific areas.  But even then... when it's your life and your future the person you must listen to and the trust most... is you!

YOU have to be the ultimate arbiter of your actions.   Your future does not depend on the opinions of others... it depends solely on your choices.

YOU determine your life... you determine your actions... 

don't let anyone ever tell you that you can't!

YOU ARE THE MASTER OF YOUR FUTURE!